Sitting here enjoying a chat with Jesus. His love embraces me and His words stir iside of me and I begin to write…
“THIS IS OUR PLACE, IT IS OUR ETERNAL PLACE. THERE IS NO END IN SIGHT. THIS IS THE PLACE FOR YOU AND ME, WHERE WE ENJOY EACH OTHER’S COMPANY. IT IS ALWAYS THERE, EVEN WHEN YOU DON’T WRITE. ITS BECAUSE MY SPIRIT RESIDES IN YOU AND WON’T LEAVE YOU. I REFUSE TO LEAVE YOU. I STIR INSIDE OF YOU, MY LOVE, MY PASSION AND DESIRE. YOU ARE MINE AND YOU ARE BRANDED ETERNALLY. THIS IS MY MARK ON YOU. MY MARK OF LOVE. IT IS FOR YOU AND FOR ALL TO RECOGNIZE THAT YOU BELONG TO ME”.
I hadn’t journaled in about a month I believe but this morning I really felt Jesus’s words flowing while I meditated on Him and I grabbed my iPad to start typing… He shared:
“MY DEAREST DOLL. HOW HAVE I MISSED YOU. YOU ARE LIKE A LIFELESS RAG DOLL WITHOUT ME. YOU NEED MY LIFE. MY LIFE KEEPS YOU ALIVE. I LOVE YOU. I HAVE MISSED YOU SO. YOU ARE MY FRIEND. I’VE MISSED MY FRIEND. YOU ARE NOT JUST MY SERVANT. YOU ARE A FRIEND. WE SHARE HEARTS. WE SHARE SECRETS. AND I’VE MISSED SHARING HEARTS WITH YOU AND SECRETS WITH YOU. COME TO ME NOW AND REST. I WANT YOU TO REST IN ME. YOU DO WELL TO TAKE A BREAK AND REST IN ME. THE ROAD AHEAD IS LONG AND YOU NEED TO REST IN ME. IT DOESN’T MATTER IF THINGS AREN’T CLEAR. THEY DON’T HAVE TO BE BECAUSE I HOLD THE ROAD MAP. I HOLD THE BLUE PRINT AND YOU KNOW ALREADY THAT I DON’T DECEIVE NOR MISLEAD YOU. YOU JUST NEED TO WALK WITH ME DAILY. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. YOU BRING ME SO MUCH JOY. HOW I WISH TO SPEND TIME WITH YOU DAILY. I CAN’T STAND BEING WITHOUT YOU. THIS IS INDEED HOW I FEEL ABOUT YOU. I HATE IT WHEN WE DON’T SPEND TIME TOGETHER. I WANT YOU WITH ME. I AM FAINT WITH LOVE FOR YOU”.
“MY DARLING BEAUTIFUL… WHAT A SPECIAL DAY WE ARE HAVING. FULL OF SURPRISES. I LOVE SURPRISES. MY SURPRISES ARE ALWAYS GOOD. THEY DON’T TAKE YOU BY SURPRISE BECAUSE I SHARE MY SECRETS UP FRONT WITH THOSE I LOVE. I SMILE WHEN I SURPRISE YOU THOUGH WITH MY GOOD THINGS. AND YOU SAY… “WHAT WAS TODAY’S SURPRISE? I DON’T SEE IT”. EYES HAVE NOT SEEN, EARS HAVE NOT HEARD, THE GOOD THINGS I HAVE IN STORE FOR THOSE I LOVE. KEEP CALM IN ME. THAT’S THE WORD. KEEP CALM IN ME. YOU ARE CALM AS YOU REMAIN IN ME AT PEACE. MY SURPRISES BLOSSOM AND COME OUT OF NOWHERE. AND BAM, THERE THEY ARE”.
I had to chuckle when He said “keep calm”. Jesus is in with the times!!!
Tonight I was struggling internally with my fleshly nature! I really wanted to act in the flesh! But I had just prayed last night that God would set me free from this. And tonight already I was put on the test. I sat there struggling. I knew what my flesh wanted to do which was the wrong attitude. But I ended up doing the right thing. I did what I knew I should do. I fixed my attitude. But later I sat down to journal. “God. I didn’t like feeling that way, having that struggle. I just prayed to be free. How can I be free, Jesus?? How can I know I am free?”
“YOU ARE FREE IN THIS – TO MAKE YOUR CHOICE. THAT’S HOW FREE YOU ARE. I HAVE GIVEN YOU FREE WILL. YOU CAN WALK IN THAT FREEDOM TO MAKE YOUR CHOICE DAILY. WHAT WILL YOU CHOOSE? WHOM WILL YOU LISTEN TO? TO MY SPIRIT OR THE FLESH? BOTH SCREAM AS LOUD. AND YOU HEAR BOTH. YOU CLEARLY HEAR BOTH. THAT’S THE FREEDOM YOU HAVE. TO KNOW RIGHT FROM WRONG AND CHOOSE. I DONT BIND YOU. I LET YOU BE FREE TO CHOOSE. YOU TELL ME HOW YOU WANT TO BE FREE”.
“Yes, my Lord Jesus. You are right!!! I hear both very loudly!!! Very loudly. Knowing I should submit to your Spirit who is nudging me and feeling that sinful nature rising. Can’t I be free from feeling that sinful nature rising?”
“YOU LIVE IN FLESH AND BLOOD. SIN WILL ALWAYS LURK. IT SEEKS YOUR LIFE. IT SEEKS TO BIND YOU. TO CONTROL YOU. YOU WILL WALK IN SUBMISSION. BUT TO WHOM? YOU WILL OBEY. BUT WHOM? YOU WILL BOW. BUT TO WHOM? I WOULD THAT YOU WOULD SUBMIT TO ONLY ME. THAT YOU’D OBEY ONLY ME. THAT YOU’D BOW TO ONLY ME. AND YET I GIVE YOU THAT FREE WILL. I NEVER TAKE THAT FREE WILL FROM YOU BECAUSE I WANT YOU TO CHOOSE TO LOVE ME. ON YOUR OWN. NOT FORCED. YOU ARE FREE MY DARLING. WALK IN FREEDOM”.
THERE IS NO SADNESS IN WAITING FOR WHAT IS GOOD. YOU ARE LEARNING NOW. YOU ARE WISE ALREADY FOR GOING AFTER WISDOM. FOOLS GO AFTER FOLLY. STAY THE COURSE. LEARN FROM MY SPIRIT. HUNGER AFTER ME AND RIGHTEOUSNESS. IT IS ME THAT MAKE YOU WISE. NOT YOUR OWN ABILITY OF STUDYING THE WORD HARD. LEAN ON ME. I GIVE YOU UNDERSTANDING. STAY WITH ME AND YOU WILL ACTUALLY FEEL THAT JOY OF LEARNING WISDOM. YOUR HEART FEELS JOY EVEN NOW AS YOU APPROACH MY SPIRIT OF WISDOM. THIS IS WEIGHTY. MY GLORY IS WEIGHTY. STAY UNDER THIS WEIGHT, IT IS LIGHT TO YOUR SPIRIT – NOT A BURDEN. IT IS A JOY TO LEARN WISDOM. YOU ARE ADMIRED IF YOU ARE WISE BUT DESPISED IF YOU ARE A FOOL. I AM THE FATHER OF INTELLIGENCE AND WISDOM. STAY WITH ME AND I WILL TEACH YOU.
MY DARLING, I SEE YOUR SORROW. IT IS GOOD FOR YOU TO EXPERIENCE SORROW, EVEN FOR A MOMENT, FOR CHANGE OF HEART TO HAPPEN. BECAUSE I LOVE YOU, I CAN NOT LEAVE YOU IN YOUR OLD WAYS. I WANT TO CHANGE YOUR HEART AND I CAN PERFORM THIS TYPE OF SURGERY. I AM GOOD AT IT. YOU WILL NOT NEED ANESTHESIA BECAUSE IT WILL NOT HURT. YOU ARE FEELING SORROW BUT THIS IS NOT THE KIND OF PAIN THAT FOOLS WILL EXPERIENCE. IT HURTS FAR MORE TO CONTINUE LIVING AS A FOOL. I AM GOOD AT WHAT I DO. YOU CAN TRUST ME TO GUIDE YOUR REPENTANT HEART. I AM NOT LATE, NO. TRUST ME THAT I AM NOT LATE. THIS IS THE RIGHT TIMING. THIS WAS THE PROPER TRAINING. YOU ARE NOW WISER BECAUSE OF THIS ROUTE. ANOTHER ROUTE WOULD HAVE NOT DONE THE JOB. TRUST ME. REMEMBER I SAID I AM NOT IN A HURRY. YOU GO BY YEARS THIS PROCESS IS TAKING BECAUSE YOU GO BY HUMAN CLOCK. I DON’T GO BY HUMAN CLOCK. I WORK IN HEARTS, HOWEVER LONG IT TAKES ON YOUR CLOCK BUT I DO A PERFECT JOB. I DO NOT CUT CORNERS TO MAKE PROCESSES FASTER. THIS IS MY TIMING AND THE OUTCOME WILL BE PERFECT. YOU CAN TRUST ME IN THIS. EVERYONE WILL EXPERIENCE THEIR OWN PROCESS AND THEY ALSO WILL LEARN FROM IT. YOUR PROCESS IS UNIQUE AND THIS IS HOW I CHOOSE TO USE YOU TO BLESS OTHER LIVES. I LOVE YOUR REPENTANCE AND IT FEELS GOOD INSIDE. WHAT A FREEDOM. IT IS FOR THIS FREEDOM THAT I HAVE SET YOU FREE. DO NOT SUBMIT AGAIN TO THE YOKE OF SLAVERY, WALKING IN YOUR OWN WAYS. YOU ALONE WOULD CONTINUE TO SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH AND AM VERY PROUD OF YOU. TO ME YOU SHINE LIKE A STAR.
“yet now I am happy, not because you were made sorry, but because your sorrow led you to repentance. For you became sorrowful as God intended and so were not harmed in any way by us. Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death. See what this godly sorrow has produced in you: what earnestness, what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what alarm, what longing, what concern, …..” (2 Corinthians 7:9-11 NIV)
DRINK IN ME MY LOVE. TRULY DRINK IN ME. ITS MY PRESENCE THAT GROWS YOU. ULTIMATELY ITS MY PRESENCE THAT GROWS YOU. LIKE ITS A MOTHERS MILK THAT GROWS A BABY IN SIZE AND IN HEALTH AND IN NOURISHMENT. YOU CAN’T GROW YOURSELF IN THESE AREAS. YOU CAN LEARN A LOT FROM OTHERS AND APPLY. BUT I GROW YOU WITH MY PRESENCE. THAT’S WHY MY WORD SAYS THAT HE WHO LACKS WISDOM, LET HIM ASK OF GOD. YOU DON’T LEARN WISDOM FROM READING. YOU BECOME SMART BY READING AND GROW IN KNOWLEDGE. BUT YOU LEARN WISDOM WITH ME. LIVING WITH ME. LIVING WITH MY SPIRIT. DWELLING WITH MY SPIRIT. LET MY LOVE GROW YOU LIKE THE SUN AND WATER GROW TOMATOES. JUST REST IN ME AND GROW. JUST REST IN ME AND GROW. THIS IS THE BEST WAY FOR ME TO EXPLAIN IN HUMAN LANGUAGE FOR YOU TO UNDERSTAND. I AM PLAIN. I AM DOWN TO EARTH. TOMATOES TAKE UP WATER AND DRINK IN THE SUN. AND THEY GROW. THEY JUST DO. AND THEY TURN RIPE IN DUE SEASON. THEIR COLOR CHANGE. THEIR SIZE GROWS. NOT BECAUSE THEY WERE STRIVING TO DO SO. THEY JUST TAKE UP WATER AND DRINK IN THE SUN. AND THEY GROW. WHY DON’T YOU DO THE SAME. JUST STAY ON THE VINE AND GROW. DRINK UP IN ME, THE SON, AND GROW.
After I was done journaling that section, I thought I’d go read Scripture and guess what passage I find in front of me! So I used all the things He just told me and replaced the original words just for my own sake. And it was like “wooooow”!!! He is so down to earth in explaining so we understand Him……
“For this reason I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to WHEN WILL YOU FINALLY REACH YOUR GOAL, WHEN WILL YOU FINALLY BECOME THE PERSON YOU ASPIRE TO BE. Is not life more than THESE GOALS? Look at the BABIES IN THEIR MOTHERS ARMS, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them AT THEIR MOTHER’S BREASTS. Are you not worth AS MUCH AS they? And who of you by being worried can add a single hour to his life OR MORE WISDOM? And why are you worried about YOUR GROWTH? Observe how the TOMATOES IN A GARDEN grow; they do not toil nor do they spin, yet I say to you that not even Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these. But if God so GROWS TOMATOES WHICH ARE ON A VINE today and tomorrow ARE FLUSHED DOWN THE TOILET, will He not much more GROW you? You of little faith! Do not worry then, saying, WHEN WILL I REACH MY DESTINY? For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you DESIRE all these things. But DRINK IN MY LOVE AND ACCEPTANCE DAILY, and all these things will be added to you. “So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. ( ADAPTED FROM Matthew 6:25-34 NASB)
I was asking Holy Spirit how to proceed after you’ve been hurt by someone’s words. Natural reaction for me is to withdraw. If rejection felt, reject back. That comes automatic. But how to respond in the Spirit? Is there anything I can do to help the other person? I sensed Holy Spirit whisper…
YES, OF COURSE LOVE (is the right reaction). LOVE ALWAYS HEALS. LOVE IS THE ONLY ANTIDOTE. AND I CARRY THAT ANTIDOTE. I HAVE IT IN STOCK. I AM NEVER OUT. JUST KEEP ASKING ME FOR ANOTHER DOSE. I HEAL COMPLETELY AND YES, THAT IS MY PLAN. NO MEMORIES OF WOUNDS. NO ISSUES AT ALL. I AM A RESTORER OF LIFE AND ALL THINGS. JUST STAY WITH ME.
So, Holy Spirit, I throw those words at the feet of the Cross, as if in a fire. I choose to. And I choose to allow you to love through me. I choose your antidote, I ask for another dose. Amen.
I was reading an old journal entry, where I was searching my own heart before the Lord, bringing a list of possible sins that I thought could be present in my heart, asking Him to remove them if He saw them there. (Am I the only one who does self searching – aka beating oneself down?)
WHY WORRY ABOUT THOSE DETAILS? I AM HERE TO SET YOU FREE FROM ANY BONDAGE. LETS KEEP WORKING ON YOUR HEART. BE WILLING FOR ME TO WORK IN YOUR HEART. I WILL TAKE YOU TO YOUR DESTINY, YOU CAN COUNT ON ME TO DO THAT. THIS WORK IN YOUR HEART IS NOT YOUR JOB, I DO THAT. IF I MAKE YOU AWARE OF ISSUES, IT IS NOT FOR YOU TO TRY TO FIX IT. YOU CAN’T NO MATTER HOW HARD YOU TRY. THE HUMAN HEART IS INTENSELY WICKED. I DO THE WORK. I NEED YOU TO BE WILLING AND OPEN. THAT IS WHAT I ASK OF YOU. ARE YOU WILLING FOR ME TO REMOVE THESE ISSUES FROM YOUR HEART? I DO IT FOR YOU. I PAID FOR THAT ALREADY AND I DO NOT INTEND TO LAY BURDENS ON YOU. ME EXPECTING YOU TO MAKE THOSE CHANGES YOURSELF IS LIKE PUTTING A BURDEN ON YOU I KNOW ALREADY YOU WON’T BE ABLE TO CARRY. MEN DECEIVE THEMSELVES IN THINKING THEY CAN HEAL THEMSELVES OF SINFUL NATURE BY TRYING HARD. ONLY I CAN HEAL THE SINFUL HEART. BE WILLING AND OPEN. ASK ME TO WORK IN YOUR HEART.
WHY THE FEAR? I DON’T FEAR THOSE SINS. THEY ARE SINS THAT HAVE BEEN AROUND FOR GENERATIONS AND EVERY TIME I DEAL WITH THEM THE SAME WAY. MY OWN BLOOD. THAT’S IT. MY BLOOD. NO OTHER RECIPE. NO OTHER WAY NOR OTHER REQUIREMENT FROM YOUR PART. JUST YOUR WILLINGNESS AND OPENESS.
Another time we discussed pretty much the same topic, just found His response, oldie, but goodie.
Then I sensed the Lord say…
IT IS OK TO REST AND NOT FEEL LIKE IT. IT IS OK TO REST. IT IS OK TO WAIT ON ME. IT IS OK JUST TO BE. THERE ARE SEASONS AND THIS IS THE SEASON TO JUST BE. TO JUST LISTEN, TO JUST WAIT. TO JUST WAIT. TO JUST BELIEVE. TO JUST BE. CAN YOU HANDLE THAT? I DON’T HAVE TO SPEAK ANYMORE. I DON’T HAVE TO EXPLAIN, I DON’T HAVE TO PROVE ANYTHING. YOU’VE BEEN HERE BEFORE AND YOU’VE GROWN. IT’S NOT THE SAME BLOCK, I PROMISE. I DON’T NEED TO TAKE YOU AROUND THE EXACT SAME BLOCK TWICE. BECAUSE YOU’VE GROWN. THE BLOCK IS A DIFFERENT BLOCK. SO TRUST ME AND DON’T ASSUME. THINGS DON’T HAVE TO BE THE SAME. I AM A MULTIFACETED GOD. I AM NOT ALWAYS THE SAME AND USE THE SAME PATTERNS. I COME IN DIFFERENT SHAPES AND FLAVORS. WOW! WHAT A THOUGHT. AND YET I AM THE SAME FROM YESTERDAY, NOW AND FOREVER. I NEVER CHANGE. YOU CAN NEVER PUT ME AND MY WORKS IN A BOX. I WILL KEEP YOU ON YOUR TOES. DON’T SIT DOWN BECAUSE ITS ABOUT TO CHANGE. JUST WHEN YOU THOUGHT YOU KNOW THE PATTERN. BAM! I AM ALWAYS IN THE GAME. DON’T EXPECT IT TO BE THE SAME ROUTINE. JUST LISTEN TO ME DAILY. THIS IS THE GAME. STAY WITH ME. I AM ALWAYS ON MY TOES AND WILL KEEP YOU THERE WITH ME. YOU SIT DOWN AND ASSUME AND YOU WILL MISS IT. TUNE IN. TUNE IN DAILY. BEFORE I TAKE YOU BY SURPRISE.
Well, then! You did take me by surprise with THAT! I did sit down and assume. hmmm. Help me tune in, Jesus. I could miss your game altogether. I thought…